Well people what you will about to read will be very strange, because it was very strange to me.
So i did Courtney Brown meditations and after that additionally some Tibetan mantras, nothing came to me and i was in very good mood.
As day gone further i accidently hold this object:
Studently it struck me like flash.
I felt it!
In my view came the picture: that i view at alien world from very tall building (daylight time 12am) , actually it was a research and observatory center.
Because previously i done the mantras, i said to me stay in the flow describe how you look like.
Than came another picture i looking in a mirror an see myself as reptile in uniform dark red color.
Then i felt a though " i need to look at the battlefield ":
In my mind i saw the picture of heavy battlefield burning buildings , heavy bombardments , aliens in blue uniforms fighting and advancing to very few left on the battlefield.
Then came another though: "Orions don't know what we have left on this planet."
Then i saw another picture me as reptile stepping inside a chamber with big blue crystal.
Feeling of ultimate power , destruction and proudness came to my sense, then alien described himself as battlefield engineer and to my senses came that such device was planted across whole star system and Orions will never have this system!
Then another picture: a claws/hands touch the crystal!
In my mind came following thoughts: for the clan, for the tribe, initiating antimatter bomb.
Then i saw big white picture the destruction of one planet , then another, then another, it felt like chained reaction.
After all of that , the last though was like :
-"oh no i am trapped into Orions soul catching machines!
I will not have a honorable death and glory to my clan! BUT THIS WILL PUT ORIONS OF LIKE 100 YEARS OFF! "
Thats it, so people if you do think that memory recovery of lost live as alien is good, i came to conclusion, that i have no remorse for what i did in my past alien life and maybe i will gain knowledge about those antimatter weapon.....