When you completed the crucifixion ruse, and you realized that you had viewed the
Christian messiah, it must have had a psychological effect on you. Do have any reflections of that?
For some of us, we've known even as kids that the whole religious belief system was false lol. Doesn't take a genius to figure it out. The programming only works on the weak minded...I mean a white man with a long beard hiding in the clouds punishing anyone for any little transgression...that sounds more like a demonic entity/alien than any "god". I figured out EnLil played Yahweh when I was about 16 and that EnKi played Lucifer and was attributed to being Satan and his son Marduk/AmonRa was the Devil and Jesus at the same time. They based "Jesus" on the whole solar cult/solar god image of Marduk. It's quite funny to see Organic Portals/soulless beings be so easily programmed by it. On the other hand, beings with a spirit managed to resist that programming a great deal and became "atheists" even though that isn't even true. It's not that they didn't believe in the Source/God they just don't follow any religious go-between between themselves and the Source...hence they became spiritual without a religion. This was all a script using holographic scenes played out for the less intelligent ancient cultures and then foisted on the world by threats of violence. Today's Islam is what the Catholic and other religions used to be...violent and bloody with blind obedience.